Is it Better to be Loved or Desired?

A wise man once said, and I will try to be as verbatim as possible. When man lie together in lust it is a surrender to the passions and does nothing for the excellence in us. But when man lie together and knowledge and virtue is pass between them. That is pure and excellent. When they compete to bring out the good, and the best in each other. This is the kind of love that can build a city state.

Since Desire is a similar sentiment as lust and lies within the excess, lacking rational and moderation